Revealing your feeling is the beginning of healing.
The Bible says, “Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed” (James 5:16a NIV). So let me ask you: Do you want to be forgiven? That’s the first step. Do you want to be emotionally healed? That’s something different.
If you just want to be forgiven, you just confess your sin to God. But if you want to get over this and get on with your life, you need emotional healing. That means you need to tell somebody else.
You say, “Why? Why do we do this? Why does God want me to drag somebody else into this?” I’ll tell you why. Because God knows that the root of our problem is relational. We don’t even realize that. Our messed-up relationships with other people are the root of our problems.
When we don’t have one person in our lives that we’re completely honest with, we wear masks. We pretend and we fake it and we’re dishonest with each other and we play games and we’re hypocrites. We pretend that we have it all together, when everybody knows we don’t. We act like it’s all right when it’s not.
What does that do? It isolates you from other people. It prevents intimacy. And it keeps you from the deepest level of love. You cannot love fully with guilt in your heart.
You are only as sick as your secrets. The fact is, the more you hide, the sicker you get. On the other hand, revealing your feeling is the beginning of healing. When you find someone that you can trust and who listens to you and shares with you, you know what happens? You find that they’ve got big problems, too — often the same problems as you.
There’s something about telling another person that uncorks the pressure valve. When you let the boogeyman out of the closet, all of a sudden, the boogeyman isn’t so big any more.
If you want healing, you’ve got to stop concealing. The very thing that you don’t want anybody to know about, that’s the area where God wants to give you the most grace, mercy, and healing.
Talk It Over
With whom can you confess your sins and share your feelings?
Who trusts you to do the same for them?
Do you consider yourself a good listener? How can you improve as a listener?
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