Communication Is Giving Your Partner In Marriage The Freedom To Disagree With You—Without Flying Into A Rage, Without Pouting For A Week Or Sulking Most Of The Day!
When you and I can sit down and talk with each other, and honestly tell each other who we are…what we think…what we feel…what we love—when I can tell you all that and know that you’re not going to eat me alive, then maybe communication can begin. Until then, it doesn’t have a chance.
The fact is, if you demand that your spouse agrees with you in all things, you are denying them emotional and intellectual life. That person will have a mental breakdown or an emotional breakdown, or they will someday divorce you.
Why is communication so important?
Because you and I are not stone statues.
In order to communicate, you must recognize and allow for change. In other words, if you knew me yesterday, please don’t think that you know me today, because I’ve changed. You are a different person that when you went to bed last night. Actually, you change little by little, every day of your life.
Someone who is getting a divorce will make the statement, “We just grew apart.” No, what really happened is that they quit communicating. I did not say they quit talking, I said they quit communicating.
You can talk about the weather. You can talk about your dress. You can talk about the car. You can talk about your child’s medical needs—but that is not communication. You are not communicating until you tell each other what you feel and what you think. Anything else is just chitchat, it’s not communication.
Source: Communication In Marriage
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